


I Don't Like Surprises (Temporarily Discontinued)

by thatoneslytherin



Category: South Park
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Boss/Employee Relationship, Co-workers, Coffee, Fluff and Smut, Multi, lots of coffee
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-23 05:15:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11396073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatoneslytherin/pseuds/thatoneslytherin
Summary: Tweek is kicked out of his parents' house after graduating high school. It's obvious he doesn't want to go to college, so being the great parents they are, they set him up with a job and apartment a few states away. Now working for a boss who either hates him or loves him and fighting a rival modelling agency, Tweek is finding it to be a bit too much pressure.( First fanfiction with a plot I've ever written. We'll see how long it is until I lose it all. {Temporarily Discontinued, I'll try to work on it more later. I've just kinda lost inspiration for this fanfic.}





	1. Bye Bye Birdy

Tweek Tweak lay spread out on the couch, watching the television while warily checking outside the window every now and then. The town hadn't changed much throughout the years, but he was still paranoid at every tiny movement or sound. He sipped from the mug in his hand, twitching violently and spilling some of the brown liquid onto his shirt.

"Gah!" He screeched, twitching again as he looked down at his shirt, silently cursing himself and his body moving without his permission.

The blond perked up when he heard a car door slam from outside, then another, signifying either that the government was here to take him away or that his parents were home from work. Neither were good. He quickly jumped up and scurried up the stairs, barely making it to his bedroom when the front door opened. He twitched as he listened closely to his parents mumbling to each other, and he squeaked when his dad called out.

"Tweek, son, can you come down here please?" He asked politely, noting the T.V. that was on, giving away that Tweek had previously been downstairs.

Tweek slowly creeped down the stairs, peeking under the overhang and through the banister, twitching as he saw his parents.

"Y- Yeah?" He asked, stuttering slightly as he noticed his mother's slightly concerned look.

"Well," She started, taking a deep breath. "You know that we've been wanting you to either go to college or take over the coffee shop, and you want to do neither." She paused to allow Tweek to scream and twitch so violently he almost fell down the stairs. "We aren't going to force you to do either. We're giving you a choice, hun."

The blond took another few steps to the floor, standing and staring at his parents once his feet were firmly planted on the ground. "Ch- choice? But I don't want to- GAH! I don't want to do either" He played with a button that had no home on his shirt as he spoke to the ground.

"We know, son. That's why we're giving you a third choice." Richard spoke with a quiet and calm voice, trying to keep his son as calm as possible.

Tweek wandered cautiously to the table to grab the coffee he had left there in his escape attempt. The green of the mug matched his shirt, and for some reason it was the only mug he ever drank out of. This is not to include paper cups, of course. He took a sip from the glass, the coffee inside rippling a bit with his shaking hands. He thought for a moment before glancing up to his parents only to decide eye contact was a bad idea, and his gaze quickly returned to the inside of the cup.

"Third choice?" He finally asked.

Richard took a deep breath and rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, your mother and I think it's about time you move out. We've found a great apartment in California and we'd love for you to go. There's a huge modelling agency there that are currently hiring new employees, and it would be a great opportunity for you to grow up a bit."

Growing up. Tweek responded with a twitch and a small, panicked noise came from his throat. Growing up. Too much pressure. He wasn't ready to leave the small town where he knew no one and no one knew him. No one depended on him here, so there was no pressure. But, did he really want to throw away another four years of his life in a school learning about a career he didn't care about? Not really. What about the coffee shop? Hell no. He wasn't going to be stuck in that shop any longer; he'd done his share of work when he was a kid.

He sighed and twitched. "Alright, California it is. W- when am I- ngh- leaving?" He asked, closing his eyes tightly and gripping his mug so tightly it may break in his hands.

"When ever you're ready, Tweek," His mom said with a wide and relieved grin.

"Preferably today," His father added, earning a disapproving look from his mom.

The boy took a few deep breaths, shaking violently with a few twitches and grunts here and there before opening his eyes. "Okay, I'll leave tonight then."

He wasn't at all ready to leave, but as he walked up the stairs he heard his parents having a not-so-silent celebration. He had to get out of this house, even if it meant going a few states away. 

Tweek took one last look out of his bedroom window as he packed as few things as possible. Shirts that were all the same, a hairbrush he never used, his laptop, some other various clothing articles he barely wore, and of course the laptop he had received for his eighteenth birthday. It was more a gift for graduating high school and moving out, though he never quite got to that last part. He was now twenty-three, and his parents were desperate to get him out of the house.

He glanced in the mirror. Despite his age, he still looked nine. His blond messy hair had hardly changed throughout the years, and his olive green shirt still appeared like it was put on by a small child who didn't know how to dress himself. He was barely reaching 5' and his green eyes, although clearly exhausted, conveyed a childhood innocence. 

He twitched before moving away from the mirror to finish packing the limited things he had. When he finished packing and had the two bags downstairs, he and his parents had a pretty quick goodbye. It was the typical "we'll miss you" bullshit with a few hugs and no tears. He was grateful, however, when his mom slipped him a couple hundred dollars to help get him started rather than surviving off a bank account with just under $1000 in it. Tweek's parents were paying rent, but living in the middle of such a populated area in California wasn't going to be cheap, especially if this job interview didn't work out.

As the sun began setting on the small town he grew up in, Tweek threw his bags into the passenger seat of the car his parents got him when he got his license and turned the key. The steady hum of the engine signified this was a new chapter in the boy's life, and as he looked in the rear view mirror to see his parents looking at his fading car fondly, he realized it really was time for him to grow up a bit. He was finally leaving the nest.


	2. Settling In

After a few hours of driving through the darkness, Tweek reached his location. It was a pretty small apartment building that seemed new, and it was luckily right across from the modelling agency he was applying to. He yawned and stretched, grabbing his two bags before quickly exiting the car.

He glanced around at the busy surroundings, cars honking at each other as they drove down the busy street. Although it was a rather small street, it reminded Tweek of a highway even if it clearly wasn't. He twitched, biting his lip. The new place was terrifying to be honest, but at least he was living on his own now without the pressure of a family business hanging above his head, ready to fall and trap him at any moment.

The blond took a deep breath, struggling to carry his bags as he entered the apartment building. Despite the rougher exterior, the interior was modern and comfortable, soft lighting on the ceiling and white couches and rugs providing a nice look. The lobby was white and clean, obviously pretty new.

Tweek carefully walked to the front desk, a small lady typing quickly on her computer. She didn't seem to notice him, so he was left to clear his throat. The woman glanced up, blonde curls hanging in her face as she conveyed surprise to see someone in the lobby so late at night.

"Oh, hello there. Can I help you, sir?" She asked politely, standing up to be more close to eye level with the boy. It was obvious she was wearing heels, but even without them she would stand taller than Tweek.

He cleared his throat again awkwardly, twitching, not quite sure what to say. "Oh, I- I'm a new ten- ngh- ant and I need my key, please," He said, shaking as he tapped his fingers on the desk's surface.

The woman nodded and sat back down, focusing on her computer. "Alright, what's your name?"

Tweek's eyes widened at this. His name. She wanted his name. What if this was some way for her to track him down? Or was she going to give the government information about him?

"Tweek T- Tweak," He stuttered quietly.

She seemed to have understood as she typed in the name and smiled. She stood again and retrieved a key from a wooden board hanging above the computer. "Here you are, Mr. Tweak. Room number thirteen. If you ever need anything, my name is Bebe Stevens." She smiled and sat back down at her computer to continue her work, leaving Tweek to his own devices.

The twitching boy gripped the key tightly, walking over to the stairs. There was an elevator, though it was covered in caution tape and labelled as "out of order". Not that he would take an elevator anyway. It could fall while taking him up and kill him. No thanks. The stairs were much less risky.

He climbed the two flights of stairs and walked down the short hallway. He shared this floor with four other tenants, though he wasn't interested in meeting them. With shaking hands he unlocked the door, picked up his bags, and entered. Within the first room was a chair, small couch, rug, television, microwave, and fridge. Not too bad. He hadn't even thought if the apartment would have been furnished or not, but he assumed his parents had taken care of it.

"GAH!" He shrieked when he walked down the small corridor to enter the main part of the apartment, and as he turned a corner to explore the bedroom was met with a man standing there. He almost fell over until he recognized the messy hair and green eyes. A mirror. It's just a mirror. He reassured himself before feeling confident enough to continue and open the door just a few feet away.

A grin spread across his face when he took in the contents of the room. A bed, dresser, closet, nightstand, and another T.V. Simplistic but perfect. It was easy to maintain, just how Tweek liked it. He checked his phone, seeing it was much earlier than he previously thought. It was nearly 10:00 P.M., which really was early considering his sleep schedule. As he stared at his new bedroom, he made a quick decision that really wasn't Tweek-like. He was going to go explore the new area.

As he checked for the fifth time that he had his key and phone, he was wondering if this was really a good idea. He had an interview the next morning, but it's not like he'd be able to sleep anyway, so why not be semi-productive. This is a start to a new life, a new man, and if exploring was part of the new and improved Tweek, then so be it.

The blond quickly locked the door and exited the new apartment, twitching nervously as the door closed. It was time to get out and do something with his life at last. He turned and began walking, messing with his hands when he almost immediately ran into someone. He screeched, covering his head and ducking to a defensive position.

"Don't kill me, please!" He begged quickly, glancing up when he heard laughing and snorting.

A man stood above him with brown hair. He wasn't all too much taller than Tweek, but there was still a noticeable height difference. The stranger's green eyes sparkled, amusement etched on his face at the blond's reaction.

"I won't kill you, dude. Chill." He reached a hand out towards Tweek, causing the boy to flinch.

When he realized it was meant to be a handshake, Tweek warily returned it, keeping a close eye on the stranger. "H- hi," He spoke quietly. 

"Yo. I'm Clyde Donovan, your neighbor I assume." He pointed to the apartment numbered 11. "Nice to meet you."

"I- I'm Tweek Twe- GAH!" He screamed, wrapping his hands around his head and pulling on his hair nervously. He wasn't used to introducing himself to people, but he took a deep breath and continued on. "Tweek Tweak." 

Clyde raised an eyebrow, though decided against saying anything. "Ooookay, well, I'll see you around I guess," He said, heading towards the stairwell.

Tweek cringed, knowing that even after saying goodbye they were heading in the same direction. Damn. He walked behind the brunette quietly, trying to be as unnoticeable as possible. Clyde glanced over his shoulder and stopped, turning around to stare at the blond.

"Are you following me?"

"W- what? No," Tweek muttered at the accusation, completely caught off guard.

"You sure? Cause it seems like you're following me."

"No, I swear. I'm new here s- so I'm- aah- going to ex- explore a bit."

"Oh, want me to show you around?" Clyde's mood had immediately changed from suspicious to rather excited, wanting to show off his town to the newbie. "This place has a surprising amount of stuff to offer," He suggested, beginning to walk again.

Tweek just followed, not quite sure he should be following a stranger. A person he didn't know who lived next door to him. Clyde could easily kill him should he decide he wanted to, so the twitching boy decided to try and stay on his good side.

It was when they reached the lobby that Clyde spoke again. "So why'd you move here?" He asked curiously, tilting his head at his new friend.

"Oh," Tweek said as they exited the building and looked across the street. The large modelling agency's building stood proud, displaying photographs of men and women showing off the newest clothing. "I'm going to be app- applying to that modelling agen- agency," He said, twitching as he pointed to the building.

Clyde's eyes lit up and he grinned at that statement. "Really? What a coincidence! Me too. I need to at least intern there for college." He pointed down a street which is where the college presumably lived. "I go to college right down there. Can't miss it if you just keep driving down that street and look to the right."

Tweek smiled a bit, wondering if college was actually fun. It obviously wasn't his first choice, but he when he thought about it he wouldn't have minded it too much. Sure, it was a lot of pressure, but it seemed like a lot of fun as well. Not nearly as bad as running a coffee shop in a quiet town where no one knows you and weird things happen often.

"So where do you want to go?" Clyde asked, putting his hands in the pockets of the red jacket he wore. The jacket was similar to the ones you would see in those high school or college movies that all the jocks wore. 

"GAH!" Tweek screeched. "Y- you choose. It's too much pressure, oh jesus," He muttered, pulling down on his shirt slightly. He didn't like having to choose things, even if it was as simple as where they were going.

The other boy looked over, slightly concerned. "Okay, okay, chill. What's with this whole... Twitchy shrieky thing anyway?" It was obvious he was trying to be polite, but Tweek assumed he was always this forward with everything.

The blond looked away and bit his lip. "I- I'm just paranoid a lot," He said, pausing to play with his shirt's buttons again. "And I drink a bit too much coffee."

Clyde decided to shrug and leave it at that as they turned a corner. As soon as Tweek was calming down and prepared to talk to his new friend again, he slammed into a large man. He was knocked off his feet and landed on his butt, temporarily stunned. He didn't move, but rather just looked up to see who he had just run into. The stranger was tall. Very tall. He had a pretty average frame, but because of his height he seemed a bit thin and awkward. 

When Tweek's eyes moved up to the man's face, he froze. An extremely bored and careless expression was being worn. The blue eyes were dull and bored as well, and although non-threatening in appearance, he seemed to give off quite a terrifying aura.

Tweek snapped out of it when Clyde offered him a hand, and the blond quickly stood, twitching. He couldn't move his eyes off of the stranger, and he jumped when he spoke.

"Watch where you're going," He said in a nasally voice that seemed similar to Clyde, but it didn't fit his appearance at all.

At this statement, though, Tweek's friend got defensive and mad. "Watch where he's going? You're the one who ran into him!"

"G- Gah! Clyde, l- let's just go, we can go out some o- other tim-" He was cut off by the stranger.

"Watch your mouth, Clyde." He said, still maintaining a monotonous tone. It was clear he listened to everything the pair said, but it still seemed like he just didn't give a fuck. How did he manage that?

The boy in the red jacket took a step closer, though it wasn't all too effective seeing as he was a few inches shorter than the large stranger. "Don't use my name, asshole. Now apologize to my friend and-" Another sentence cut short as the stranger pushed past him and continued on his way. "Mother fu-"

This time Tweek cut him off. "C- Clyde, let's just go back to th- the apartments. It's not wor- ngh- worth our time."

Luckily, Clyde listened, and they headed back to the apartment building, trying to forget about the stranger. The two exchanged phone numbers and said goodbye before heading into their respective apartments. 

Tweek brewed a pot of coffee, brushed his teeth, changed into a pair of sweatpants, and climbed into bed. He turned on the T.V. and took a sip of coffee, cringing as the toothpaste mixed with the drink. Browsing the channels, he quickly found there to be nothing on and settled for some Meerkat Manor on Animal Planet. He yawned and stretched, settling in underneath the covers, and as he drifted off to sleep, he couldn't get the image of the stranger out of his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh?? All the comments and kudos already and it's only been one chapter! You guys have no idea how excited I am to be working on this, ahhhh! I love all of the comments, and I'm super happy to see you guys are enjoying it! Sorry this chapter may seem a bit rushed, I've been super busy lately. Hopefully I'll be able to have a bit more time to work on the next chapter. c:

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys are enjoying the first chapter! I've never really written anything seriously before, so I'm trying really hard with this one. I'll try to update twice a week while I'm enjoying summer vacation!


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